5 months to go so here’s an update!

Marriage preparation ourse: Went for our 1 day course at Apkim yesterday and we found ourselves crying 20 minutes into it haha sampai the trainer said she’s never come across such cengeng couple during these courses. First half was the personalised session while the second half we joined five other couples and it was hilarious. Except for the part where the second trainer keeps making sexual jokes and I don’t know about you, but I HATE it when Malays make sexual jokes like I will honestly get so uncomfortable and cringe. Not saying I’m a prude but sigh. I understand the whole layaning the husband is a wife’s responsibility but the whole time during the course it sounds like as if wives are sexual slaves. Then the whole class started laughing when I asked, “abeh kalau isteri nak tapi suami tak nak?” and the trainer lagi boleh cakap, “kalau gitu suami tu bodoh namanya!!” I don’t know how to feel about this. Oh wells that aside, most importantly, everything taught ada unsur-unsur agama. I’ve also been attending marriage related classes conducted by Muslim Youth Forum since beginning of the year when I’m free and the recent one titled “Sharing Your Husband with Your Mother In Law” was absolutely amazing.

Kain for family: The family has also settled their kains for Saturday and Sunday. Lepas beban because we’ve been debating what colors to wear and my brother told me off when I said no to one of the laces because “bukan kau yang pakai ape!!” haha memang betul but NO.

Dulang: Tarte had their festival sale last month and Sephora had the recent black sale and with this, I spent a whopping $7xx on makeup lol I hate myself Banyak lah nak save duit. Some of the items will go on my dulang so I’ve got about three settled. Left with two more dulangs. Need to buy ring and last dulang next month so tak payah pikir pasal ni lagi. Such unnecessary spending haha ugh

Tok Kadi/ROMM: We can register this coming week and I’m not sweating about this since my tunang and his mom will settle on “booking” of the tok kadi. Initially wanted my uncle-in-law to be my saksi and I was set on this for months until I realise how come I didn’t ask my brother eh? My mom talked to him about it to see if he’s okay and he was like yes of course and then she said “okay jangan pergi mana mana hari tu” ??????? Adik dia nak nikah kot?? Mana eh dia nak pergi?? Kelakar seram mak aku ni satu

Wedding card: Talked to the guy on whatsapp (my aunt got me to liaise directly with him) and he sent me basically a million pictures of wedding card samples until I don’t know how to choose. Coincidentally he lives right behind my workplace so I asked if it’s okay to meet him during lunch time to see the samples in real life and he said okay so yay meeting him tomorrow to finalise. Then left with the details and hopefully can no longer think about this by end of this month.

I don’t know what else. Still relaxed. About 150 days left. I hope to not worry about this during Ramadan so I can fully focus on my much needed detox and cleansing myself haha. Things should start getting busy in July. Kalau July pon masih relaxed aku tak tahu ape nak cakap.

Siapa cakap $50 to book void deck?

What happened to the cozycot malay muslim wedding forum and why did it close down?? 😦

(Photo Credit: Lini’b)

Does anyone know of any vendor/carouseller/ig store who does one of these customised rubber stamps? I don’t know what got into me but I feel like I want to have one of these and stamp on every single envelope of my wedding invites. The one I posted looks really great but I’d like to have more choices (read: it’s too expensive haha). If you had this for your wedding or planning to have please help a sister out!

My parents and I went to the town council yesterday to book the void deck. We made the booking for Friday with electricity and water too since my aunt will start her cooking on that night. Cooking on Saturday morning would be too rushing since nikah is at 10am? I don’t know. When will the decor people come to start their work? My aunt said Thursday night and that Friday night would only be for touching up but we’re only booking the place from Friday onwards so is this allowed?

There’s also a clause that states “no obstruction to sheltered passageway to ensure smooth flow of human traffic” (aka building a tentage at the walkway, the one that the annoying hdb officer sternly said no to) and I’ve been freaking out about this eversince lol. Especially when we’re planning to have a separate tentage just for the pelamin. Which will obstruct passageway even more. I’m not exactly a by the book kinda person but I’d rather not get into trouble? My dad told me not to ask the counter staff anything about it. If anything the clause said sheltered passageway and both the places we’re having the tentage at are not sheltered hahah. He was like, “Kita buat tentage so what? Majlis dah start they cannot do anything about it. They want to ban me from using the void deck to hold another majlis? My children are all married by then.” Fierce lah ni bapak. Tak dapat $300 deposit balik baru tahu.

But my ultimate worry is if there’s a cina mati happening before my wedding and by Thursday they tak nak keluar… I know they have to call the town council and the latter won’t accept if they wanna use the void deck if it might drag till Friday but we won’t know!! Janganlah ada jiran aku mati minggu tu 😦 For my sister’s wedding seven years ago, her reception on Sunday was supposed to be until 6pm but at 5pm like that, they came with the mayat and asked us to vacate lah!! I wasn’t at the venue then but I think we wrapped it up quickly so they could use the void deck since the mayat was already there waiting haha wth kan!! Block sebelah ada pe!!

Anyway something interesting – I don’t know if it’s exclusive to my estate but the first clause states to ensure there’s no kuda kepang performance?? Is it gahmen tak suka tengok orang in trance and makan glass?? Haha interesting. Aku pon tak suka.

Setengah tahun lagi gang!

6months

I’m left with less than six months to the wedding (WHAT! where did the time go?!) and it has also been six months since my last (also the first) meeting with my caterer (who will also be doing my decor, berkat, wedding card, wedding cake, bridal room, sirih dara, bunga pahar, bunga rampai..) haha actually everything lah but saje nak type semua.

We finally had another meeting to finalise some things yesterday and I’m extremely glad we’re engaging a relative (the caterer’s my uncle’s wife) to be in charge of the entire wedding. It’s so easy to communicate and negotiate and she knows what I like and what I don’t and I can’t imagine having this kinda conversations with an outsider. I mean, how do you exactly ask your caterer to use the fish head from sunday’s menu to cook up kari kepala ikan for saturday night? Hahah. Sometimes I feel kita mengada ngada since tukang masak is sedara sendiri but she’s genuinely obliging so we’re all happy!

Anyway, just last weekend I was on instagram and I came across this super nice wedding card/berkat vendor from Malaysia and I was half begging my mother to let me have this and not use my aunt’s even though it’s all included in the package. She didn’t mind and I was already asking the Malaysian lady a million questions. Satisfied with the design and price quoted until she told me it will cost RM250 TO SHIP THE 600 PIECES OF WEDDING CARDS AND ENVELOPES TO SINGAPORE. 2 5 0 W T H. So I’m back to using what my aunt is providing. I’ll have to liaise directly with her wedding card vendor and I won’t know the designs until end of the month when he’s back in Singapore so we’ll see. Lesson learnt lah. Jangan gatal tengok tengok instagram kalau dah settle benda. Buat sakit hati je haha.

For this month I’m left to settle the rental of aircooler units, booking of void deck this Saturday, and buying kains for my family next Sunday. Yay! Excited to be busy with wedding planning all over again hehe.

Unpopular opinion

hantaran

I am very sick of hearing all these hantaran talks that’s been circulating online. And I think it’s because I’m in the wedding planning phase that I’m easily triggered by all the comments made by netizens. You know how some people (mostly Malaysian women on facebook) say things like they only spent this little amount for their wedding? Because they decided to eliminate all these unnecessary spendings? Like having just mas kahwin with no hantaran. Or holding a walimah for nothing more than 100 pax. Yes, the most blessed marriage (nikah) is the one with the least expenses. But man, it seems like you’re doing the humble bragging. And it gets me everytime. It’s like you’re shaming those who chose to have a lavish wedding with five live stations and $20,000 hantaran. I know, or I hope at least, that it’s not your intention. Sigh. Why am I so affected with this.

Bride’s Girl Gang

bridesmaids

(Photo Credit: Hafizudin Hamdan)

I didn’t know I was going to have bridesmaids until my four girlfriends sternly and confidently asked said, “we are going to be your bridesmaids, RIGHT?” lol. I was put on the spot so I obviously had to say yes. Just kidding lah, I have been toying with the idea of having my own bride’s brigade and there’s really no one who’s more fitting than these girls. Quite literally cos they’re my only friends HAHAHAH!! And like, we live just a few blocks away from one another so it’ll be easy for me to pull a “malam ni korang free kan? tolong mak aku pack berkat pls?” or “tengok tengokkan eh dari tingkap kalau pelamin roboh ke tak” haha.

I thought bridesmaids were completely unnecessary until I saw my brother’s groomsmen. He had like around 10 okay wth?? While my sil had none?? Asal perangai bridezilla sangat ni isn’t it usually the other way round haha. Despite seeing how hard they worked on his wedding day, I still have no idea the roles my bridesmaids should take on seh….. I have only been a bridesmaid once and I was a completely useless one at it. And it was one of my closest friends’ wedding somemore. Menyesal gila and I still shudder at the thought of how useless I was haha.

So anyway.. yah. What help did you girls get (or planning to get) from your own squad? Someone to run the event and ensure the itinerary is being followed? Bride’s right-hand woman and mak andam replacement when she leaves? Side hostess to help your parents and guide guests to them and gather families for photo taking? Someone to liaise with vendors and make payments?

HAHA BENGAP LAH DAH TANYA ABEH JAWAB SENDIRI!!!

But okay this is something I’m quite curious about. The outfits they’ll be wearing. I’m not gonna make them wear Poplook dresses because it’s not them and I know they won’t wear it again. Does the bride pay for this or do they fork out on their own…? I’m leaning towards the former but if I’m already providing them the fabric, do I still pay to get them tailored or this is them? Isn’t it also troublesome to get my girls go through the hassle of having something tailored? The last thing I want is for my family and friends to feel my wedding is a burden seh 😦

14

Today marks our 7th month of being engaged. So this also means we’re 7 months away from our wedding. My wedding countdown widget says it’s 214 days to the big day. Also on the day we got engaged we decided to get married 14 months later on the 14th. We’re one month shy of our 4 years anniversary. Nampak sangat aku suka nombor 14 kan???????? Abeh nanti kalau nak beranak confirm semua anak nak keluarkan on the 14th lol I won’t be surprised kalau perangai aku macam gini later on.

The past 7 months haven’t exactly been a walk in the park. But we’re still here today, still so in love with each other just like how we were four years ago, if not more. We started this relationship knowing we wanted to marry each other, right from the beginning. It wasn’t that kind of relationship where we dated for a long while and only got serious and talk about settling down after say, two years. We got serious right at the start haha. It all made sense to me. Why some people decide to get married after a few months of knowing each other, or why some couples decide to have each other’s names tattooed on their body. But why only now, why only 4.5 years later to finally settle down.. I don’t know. I guess it’s just one of those things that’s been written for us kot?

So I’ve been thinking the whole day. If we can get through the past 7 months, I sure hope the next 7 will be easy for the both of us, inshallah.

Sis ada problem ni..

Assalamualaikum sihat semua? Sis sihat alhamdulillah and badan pun makin sihat ni astaghfirullah boleh kasi sis tips nak kecikkan badan selain pergi gym tak pasal sis adalah semangat sign up untuk jadi member tapi sejak bulan dua hari tu dah tak pergi lagi pasal malas nauzubillah. Duit pon burn tapi nasib company boleh bayarkan untuk gym membership so tak lah terkilan sangat hahah.

But no seriously though. Do you girls have any strict habits you follow so that that first bridal fitting wouldn’t be so tormentous? I have been trying to drink more water (but I always drink like 3-4 litres of water each day so this is easy) and stop on sugary drinks, eliminate fast food and cut down on rice, and stop eating after a certain time.. all these tips I’ve heard of lah basically since October last year (konon here’s to a better eating habit one year to wedding) but it’s been five months since those and I AM A HUGE FAILURE LOL. Every new month I’m like OKAY LET’S DO THIS NO JOKE but then every morning my colleague would ask what we want for breakfast and I’ll be like hmm that super gao milo peng from opposite pls? I hate myself.

A while back before I started this blog I came across this btb’s blog from 2013 and how she lost 26kg(!!!!!!) in 8 months. 12kg in the first 3 months and I was so motivated. I’m not the kind who needs her rice daily in fact I think I can go on without rice for a really long time. But ntah asal macam susah nak lose weight? I blame it on my lack of ability to cook and the inacessibility to get proper halal food around my workplace haha. Haiya actually aku ni banyak songeh and semangat seminit punya orang.

Okay lah okay tomorrow marks my 7 months to wedding so I will start this proper tomorrow. I’m gonna meet my fiance after work and makan besar dulu hahahahahaissss

 

kermit